Friday, February 13, 2009

My Island: Fourteen Reasons Why

For those of you not familiar with the "My Island" concept please refer to my older posts by clicking on the "My Island" label at the bottom of the post. There are five I believe.

The short of it is, certain people annoy me to the point that I banish them to an island where they are to live their life out among others that annoy me. There they cannot harm the rest of us with their politics, their stupidity or their general annoying nature. Here is a list of current residents:

On the island:

Ann Coulter

Rick Santorum (escaped and captured)

Brittany Spears

Amy Winehouse

Lindsay Lohan

Elisabeth Hasselbeck

My newest addition deserves to be there almost as much as Ann Coulter. Look in the dictionary under the word 'selfish' and this woman's picture will be there. She has dragged her whole family down with her and still continues to defend herself on primetime and any media outlet that gives her fifteen minutes. That's right, it's Octo-mom, Nadya Suleman.

I held off on sending her to the island for 14 reasons. Her kids. This topic "My Island" is all in good fun but when I was putting this post together I started thinking about what will happen to those kids, even if their horrible mother was around. I struggled with even sending her...until today.

Today my first assumptions about why this woman decided to turn her 'vagina into a clown car' (props to Cherlyn for that phrase) were verified. She is panhandling via the internet. Yes, the woman who said she was never on welfare or accepted government money for having all those kids is asking YOU to support them via donations on the internet (not like you aren't going end up supporting them via your taxes or anything). Oh, she also lied about the not accepting $$ from the government, she is on food stamps. Excellent. I am not providing you with the link to said site because as you bloggers know, the more traffic she gets the more $ she gets. This is what she wanted all along. She decided to have multiples to cash in on the books, reality tv and bleeding hearts. She neglected to realize that those that DO have reality tv shows, etc because of their large family sizes did not TRY to have large families in order to GET a tv reality show. She did it backwards. Oh...she is also crazier than Jim Jones but just as self-centered.

I decided that she was done. She needs to be removed from the population NOW. I am worried that she and Rick Santorum might try to start a new race so precautions will need to be taken. Rick will need to be castrated. This will be performed by Ann Coulter. She agreed to do this as long as we provided her with a newsfeed of C-SPAN and a voo doo doll. I let her also pick the method of castration.

So Nadya will be welcomed with open arms by the other crazies that are there and we will not have to watch her pimp her children out to the world anymore. I think that is just lovely.

Now...the kids. What to do with the kids. While we are on the subject, what about the other kids of the inhabitants?

Tune in Monday for my "My Island" spin off. "What About the Kids?"

On the island:

Nadya Suleman
Ann Coulter
Rick Santorum (escaped and captured and neutered)
Brittany Spears
Amy Winehouse
Lindsay Lohan
Elisabeth Hasselbeck


my2boyz said...

I just knew it was going to be her!! LOL She so deserves to be there!

L.R. M-J said...

Ok, I got a good one for 'ya, make sure you're not currently drinking or eating anything, wouldn't want to be responsible for you choking...

I read an article (sorry, can't remember where) and they referred to her as the 'Octopussy' ...HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...seriously, I guffawed (only word to describe it). I know a few couples out there who would be quite happy to adopt the little darlings desperately in need of sane parents....

And the sperm donor...he's a few cupcakes shy of a full dozen! Speaking of cupcakes think you'll like what I'm making for Valentine's! Will send you photos...

BS5 Blogger said...

Wow - that was a fierce post (and I laughed at the Vagina powered clown car!)

She seems a bit crazy but would you consider parole if she kept the clown car firmly locked from now on?

I am not sure who Rick Sanitation is but castration seems a little harsh. Is he that former Penn' Sen?

Have a happy Valentine's Saturday with Mr Scargosun and G Dog!

Seeya on Monday!

Cherlyn said...

LOL thanks for the credit on my "clown car" comment.

She is definitelty a perfect addition to the Island.

Sue said...

Octopussy! I love that as much as the clown car comment. Maybe you haven't heard the latest news, but evidently Angelina Jolie has letters that octopussy sent to her that border on stalkerish! Her lips definitely said Jolie about them when she was talking to Ann Curry. I had to watch, it is like being sucked into to crazy world.
I do feel badly for the kids. I'll take one.

J'Ollie Primitives said...

I'm hoping to see that she's giving them ALL up for adoption. Wouldn't that make a great headline?

Welcome to the island, Nadya. Keep your legs crossed.

TSannie said...

Perfect addition, simply perfect!

Brett said...

To mark the last post of my year long blog a quick thank you for following it.

Muffy Willowbrook said...

Couldn't agree more!

Kelley with Amy's Angels said...

Oh! That's good!

American in Norway said...

Yep...she is a nutter... & needs to be locked up, before she gets knocked up..A G A I N

Los said...

I absolutely LOVE the "Vagina into a clown car" quote ... I'm so using this! I agree totally!

Mrs Parks said...

I am SO glad it was her!

Debbie said...

Hey! I came here by way of TSannie and I laughed my butt off at this!

First post I've read and I think I love your blog :)

Anonymous said...

I agree!

Capricorn said...

I think..since she already kinda favors Angelina Jolie, and since Angelina is always willing to adopt a million kids...maybe they should cut out the middle man, (sorry Brad) and have angelina (since she has the room and the money to take care of them all)adopt all 14 of Angelas kids. The bonus to this is, since they favor, eventually all the kids will kind of favor Angelina. Sort of.

Thats my idea...this is probably why no one lets me make big decissions.

Mama Dawg said...

If anyone belongs there, it's certainly that quack job.

Anonymous said...